An Anthology of Wreck-It-Ralph Tales
by crankyman7
Summary: An assortment of short stories featuring the four leads from Wreck-It-Ralph: Ralph, Vanellope, Calhoun, and Felix. Written with assistance from JarrettSoon, who will also be the primary author of some of the entries.
1. Chapter 1

A Game of _Pong_

By Crankyman7

Vanellope watched through the screen of _Sugar Rush_ as the lights dimmed. It had been an exhausting day; their game was the most popular it had been in years, and it was all because of her. It was a reputation that was proving time-consuming to live up to, this popularity among the other players. Fortunately, she always had Ralph to restrain her, should she have been tempted to rub it in the others racer's faces- as indeed, she had been often.

_Why anger them?_ she always reminded herself. _They've been going out of their way to be nice to me. And they all still get chosen in races anyway, so it's not like anyone gets ignored._

The lights were finally out. She turned and headed straight for the wire that led to game Central Station. She passed the candy fields, went up the rainbow, through the wire…and then met the Surge Protector.

"Name?"

It was the same monotonous voice, day in and day out, that Vanellope heard every time she entered or exited her game and was hearing now. It was the same monotonous voice that slowed her down needlessly, she thought.

"Name?" said the voice again.

"President Vanellope von Schweetz."

"Destination?"

She hadn't thought about that one. Ralph had said he'd be otherwise occupied that night, so she hadn't been sure what she'd do.

"Destination?"

"Um…"

"You need a suggestion?" the Surge Protector asked.

"Sure, why not?" Vanellope blurted out.

"_Pong_," said the Surge Protector.

"_Pong_?" Vanellope asked. "What's _Pong_?"

"It's a Ping-Pong game," said the Surge Protector. "It's one of the oldest games around."

"Fine," said Vanellope, as much to escape the conversation as to have something to do.

"_Pong_," said the Surge Protector. "Okay. Are you carrying anything?"

"My brains, duh!"

"What you have of them," the Surge Protector replied bluntly. He held up a hand to cut off Vanellope's reply and asked: "Anything to tell me?"

"Inject some more emotion into your voice," Vanellope said. "Then maybe this'd be less irritating."

"A fascinating suggestion," said the Surge Protector. "Might I also suggest you improve your attitude?"

Vanellope almost shot back a snarky response, but she held her tongue. The Surge Protector had a point.

"Fair enough," she said.

She headed straight for _Pong, _sliding into the wire that would take her into the game. All the way down, she wondered what it would be like.

And then she came out of the wire and saw it- the vast carpet of black with the white net stretched across it, contrastingly starkly with its surroundings. A screen could be found in each of the upper corners that displayed the scores when the game was in use. The lighting was dimmed, and there was no one in sight.

"Like it?" said a voice behind her.

Vanellope gave a yelp of surprise and glitched herself three feet into the air before landing flat on her face. She picked herself up in time to see a white paddle floating before her. It had no trace of facial features and yet it seemed capable of sight, hearing, and speech. The voice seemed to come from within the center of the paddle, and it was almost ethereal in tone.

"Ye-ye-yes," Vanellope stammered. "It's nice."

"You know," said the paddle, circling her, "you're the first visitor we've had around here in ages. We're popular with the players, but with our fellow game characters…not so much.'

'So," the paddle continued, "what brings you down here?"

"The Surge Protector…suggested I come."

The paddle sighed, and the sigh was like the soft passing of the wind.

"I might have guessed we owed the occasion to charity," it said. "Old Surge must have been feeling sorry for us and sent you down here."

"I don't know," Vanellope admitted. "You…never get visitors?"

"Never," said the paddle. Then, it leaned back; had it had limbs, Vanellope would have expected it to be clapping a hand to its forehead. "Oh, it's been so long I'm forgetting my manners," it said. "Name's Otis, by the way."

"I'd shake your hand, if you had a hand," said Vanellope.

"You can shake my handle," said Otis. Vanellope did so.

"Hey Floyd!" Otis called. "Hey Floyd! We got a visitor!"

"First time in twenty years," said another paddle, floating rapidly from the far side of the field towards Vanellope. "First time in twenty stinking years some other character has had the courtesy to acknowledge our presence, yet we were the forerunners of so many games that have come along since we debuted. We were here before Mario, before Kirby, before Felix, before Link and Zelda, yes even before players were beating back alien invasions."

"Right, in _Space Invaders_," said Vanellope.

"Been learning your history, huh kid?"

"Right uh…Floyd?"

"That's my name, kid," said the paddle. "So, what brings you down here?"

"Curiosity, I guess," said Vanellope.

"Curiosity, eh?" said Floyd. "Great, we're a source of mere curiosity now. You hear that Otis? That's rich, that is."

"Don't scare off the girl," Otis told Floyd, his ethereal voice contrasting sharply with the snarky tones of his fellow paddle. "She's done you and me a favor, coming down here to cheer us out of our loneliness."

"So we're now to be objects of charity?" said Floyd. "I'm _so _delighted." He floated closer to Vanellope. "You got a name, cutie?"

Vanellope tried to make herself look as tall as she possibly could. "Vanellope von Schweetz, Princess of _Sugar Rush_," she said.

"You can try to look imposing all you like kid," said Floyd. "You'll just succeed in looking absurdly adorable."

Vanellope was incensed. How dare this paddle ridicule her?

"And you…can try to sound tough all you want, but it's just all bluster I bet!" she exclaimed.

"Oh boy," said Otis. "Now you've done it."

Indeed, she had. Floyd zipped right up to Vanellope's face, leaning over her and forcing her to bend backwards in surprise.

"Sassy, are we?" he said. "We'll, how about a match of Ping-Pong between you and me, huh? Let's see if you can turn your verbal pluck into action."

"I…don't know how to play," said Vanellope, caught off guard. She looked towards Otis, silently imploring him to save her from the predicament.

"Oh don't worry, Otis here can give you a rundown on the rules," said Floyd. "Can't you Otis?"

"I can do that," said Otis.

"Then it's settled," said Floyd. "Otis, tell Miss Sassy here how our little game works."

"But I didn't agree to play!" Vanellope protested.

"No use backing out on Floyd when he's like this," said Otis. "He'll trumpet your cowardice to the world if you don't play."

"I'm no coward," said Vanellope, her eyes narrowing.

"Then play," said Floyd. "Otis, tell her how it works."

"It's simple," said Otis. "One player starts the game by hitting the ball across with a paddle. The other has to knock it back to the other side of the net without it hitting the ground on their side. Points are scored when a player fails to hit a ball back over the net and it hits the ground on their side. When that happens, the player whose side the ball did _not_ fall on gets a point. The player with the most points at the end of the game wins.'

'For this game, we're going to make a few adjustments," Otis continued. "Each player will use a small paddle, and the ball will be smaller to accommodate this change. Ordinarily, Floyd and I would be the paddles and the balls would be larger, but you, Vanellope, are not a paddle. For that reason, you also cannot touch the ball with any part of yourselves, except to throw it in order to start a new face-off once a point is earned."

"This'll be good," Vanellope said, giggling. "A paddle using a paddle. Who would have thought it?"

"I'm making this as fair as I can," said Floyd. "In case you didn't notice, I'm bigger than you. If I used myself, it'd be a gross mismatch."

"If you all are done interrupting," said Otis, "Here's the rest of the information. The maximum score for the match will be nine points."

"That's all?" said Floyd.

"It's all you two need to prove whatever you seem so determined to prove," said Otis, and Vanellope could detect a hint of frustration behind his words.

"Are you ready kid?" Floyd asked Vanellope.

"Yeah," said Vanellope. "Ready to whip your butt."

"Fat chance of that," said Floyd. "Paddles deploy!"

Two paddles rose out of the floor, one in front of each player. Vanellope grasped hers tightly, while Floyd's rose into the air, its handle resting alongside the place where his own head met his own handle.

A ball shot out of the ground in front of Vanellope.

"Our guest gets the courtesy of starting the match," said Otis. "Vanellope, you may begin."

Vanellope grasped the ball in her left hand. It felt oddly heavy, but she managed to hit it over the edge of the net with her paddle nevertheless. Moments later, it came whizzing back. Faster than she could spot it, the ball had hit the ground on her side of the net. Floyd's screen flashed the number one.

"Nice try sweetie," said Floyd, "but you'll have to be faster than that."

Fuming, she tossed the ball back to Floyd, who began the new round. Once again, she was beaten. And again. And then again. And again once more. Each time, Floyd's screen flashed a higher number.

The sixth round began, and Vanellope readied herself once more. This time, she was going to hit the ball, she decided. She saw it coming, aimed carefully, timing here swing…and sent the ball flying over the net and crashing directly into Floyd. The paddle was sent hurtling backwards until he hit the far wall of the field.

"Floyd!" Otis cried out in alarm. He zipped towards the spot where his fellow paddle had landed. Vanellope raced after him, worry etched on her features.

Floyd had shattered into three pieces against the far wall, and was in the process of regenerating when they arrived. Whole once more, he hurtled towards Vanellope, towering over her like a prophet of woe. Had he possessed a face, Vanellope was sure Floyd would have been glaring. As it was, his voice conveyed every ounce of furious bewilderment that the fiercest glare could have.

"How much force did you put into that blow?" he shouted. "If I had been outside my game, you'd have killed me. What were you thinking, you idiotic child?"

Floyd stopped. Tears were sliding down Vanellope's cheeks and her body was shaking as though she feared imminent retaliation.

"I didn't mean…I didn't want to…" she whispered. "I _broke_ you."

Floyd backed slowly away from Vanellope. His tone somewhat kindlier, he said: "I do believe you were worried about me."

"I know what loneliness is," she said. "I experienced it for fifteen years. And then I meet someone who's had a similar experience…and all I can do is treat him like dirt."

"I don't know what you went through kid," said Floyd, "though a few rumors reached me. I don't expect you to share your story right now either. But I know one thing- being mostly ignored for twenty solid years can make a guy bitter. And that bitterness just grows when you know that it's not any malevolence on the part of others, but rather simple indifference. Someone who hates you cares about you, if only in a negative fashion. But when people don't care one way or the other…" He sighed. "For some, that can be far worse than outright rejection."

Otis began nudging Vanellope towards the game's exit. "Maybe you'd better go now," he said.

"No, that's alright," said Floyd. "I'd like Vanellope to stay awhile longer…if she's open to doing so."

A smile crept onto Vanellope's face. She nodded.

* * *

Daylight was creeping into the sky outside the arcade as Vanellope exited _Pong_. She almost didn't see the Surge Protector, until he was inches away from her face.

"Name?" he asked.

"Vanellope von Schweetz." The reply was in a normal voice, with no sign of irritation behind it.

"Destination?"

"_Sugar Rush_."

"Are you carrying anything?"

"No."

"Anything to tell me?"

"I'm trying to work on my attitude."

"That's a new one," said the Surge Protector, and Vanellope thought she could sense the faintest flicker of an emotion in his voice. She couldn't tell what it was though.

"I'm attempting to convey pleasure," said the Surge Protector.

"Sorry, I couldn't tell," said Vanellope with a small laugh. "But I thought I heard just a hint of something in your voice. Keep trying."

She walked on, as the Surge Protector bashed his head against the wall of Game Central Station.

* * *

**Author's Note: I extend my thanks to JarrettSoon for editing this first story, and for showing an appreciation for the underlying concept.**


	2. Chapter 2

Shoot 'em Up Felix

By JarrettSoon and Crankyman7

Felix sat down on the bench and impatiently swung his legs. He was waiting for his wife, Tamora, to get off from work. Tonight was their weekly date. They would have dinner and go do something together, each taking turns to choose where to eat and what to do.

Felix smiled dreamily thinking about their first date night, last week. He had chosen to have a picnic in _Super Mario_, fly a kite and watch the sun set together. He sighed. He got the honeyglows just thinking about the smile on her face that night- the beautiful high definition smile.

He was jolted out of his reverie by the sound of the train pulling into the _Fix-It Felix Jr._ station. Calhoun stepped off and pulled Felix into a tight embrace. Their lips met briefly and then Calhoun withdrew, grinning. "Evening, Fix-It."

"And to you, darlin," said Felix. He sighed.

"Right, you softie," said Calhoun, still grinning. "Just wait till you see what's happening tonight?"

"Where'd you pick for dinner tonight?" Felix asked.

"Dinner?" said Calhoun. "Dinner? Not just dinner tonight. No Felix, I've got something special planned for tonight before we got to dinner, and-"

She was interrupted by three short beeps from her walkie-talkie. She clicked the transmission button.

"Yes?" said Calhoun. She listened for a few moments. "He _what_? Roger that Kohut, I'm on my way."

"Whoa, ma'am!" Felix exclaimed as Calhoun fired up her hoverboard and pulled him on. Clinging tightly to her legs, he asked, "What's the rush?"

"That idiot Markowski triggered another nest of Cy-Bugs", said Calhoun. "He was cleaning up some residue after we closed up shop for the night, and then his flashbacks were triggered…"

She ground her teeth in frustration.

"But doesn't the beacon take care of those pests?" asked Felix, puzzled.

"New ones take their place right afterwards, and- oh, no time to explain. Bottom line is some of eggs in the tower were hatched. We've got to keep them from leaving the game while I reactivate the beacon."

"Pardon?" said Felix. "Why-"

As they burst into Game Central Station, Calhoun cut him off with an upraised hand. "Hold that thought," she said as the Surge Protector immediately appeared and began his security check.

"Stand down," she told the Surge Protector. "This is an emergency and we must not be delayed. Cybugs are loose."

The Surge Protector nodded and vanished out of sight. Angling her hoverboard towards the entrance to _Hero's Duty_, Calhoun lowered her hand.

"Alright, now," she told Felix.

"I thought the beacon would have stayed on," said Felix. "Just in case."

"The game wasn't programmed that way," said Calhoun. "The beacon is deactivated after arcade hours. Only I can reactivate it. Usually the patrol group flushes out any rogue Cy-Bugs or nests. From the sound of it, though, they've bitten off more than they can chew this time."

The duo sped into the muster hall, where Kohut was waiting for them. He saluted and greeted them. "Evening Sarge, Felix. My apologies for interrupting your plans, but we're really in trouble this time."

"Give it to me quickly," Sergeant Calhoun said while suiting up.

"It's simple," said Kohut. "We've got the whole squad out, but they're pinned down halfway between the tower and the game entrance. No cybugs have gotten through yet but…"

"Got it," said Calhoun. "Can the boys give me enough cover so I can get to the lab and get the beacon on?"

"If our boys can't do it sir, nobody can," said Kohut.

Sergeant Calhoun snapped on the final piece of her armor and activated her plasma blaster.

"Kohut, lead the way," she said. "Felix, can you wait in my office?"

"Can't I come with you?" Felix asked.

Calhoun shook her head. "Sorry. Destroying isn't your thing, right? I'll be back soon."

Felix nodded. "Be careful, all right?"

Calhoun smiled and strode off behind Kohut. Felix watched them until a swarm of Cy-Bugs enveloped them, barely a hundred meters from the lab entrance. Several explosions startled him, and he quickly scuttled off to Tamora's office.

As he passed the room next to the office, a flash of light blinded him. When it faded, three soldiers were sprawled on the floor, dazed. They quickly stood up and dashed past Felix. He called out, "Hey, wait!"

One of them looked back. "Why the delay, soldier? We've got a battle to win!" Realizing who Felix was, he exclaimed:

"What are you doing here? This is a war zone right now, and we don't want civilian deaths!"

"Is Tamora okay?" Felix asked. "Last I saw, she was under attack."

"The sarge?" the soldier replied. "Haven't seen her, but I wouldn't worry about her. She's never been overwhelmed by Cy-Bugs before. Now get away before you die!"

The soldier dashed off. Felix started looking around the room behind him, which turned out to be the armoury. He browsed through the weapons, looking at different varieties of handguns and grenades. He walked over to the futuristic section, nodding to several more regenerated soldiers. He saw the blaster that Tamora used, as well as the standard-issue blaster that the soldiers toted.

Another flash of light interrupted him. Felix turned to see Calhoun lying on the ground. He gasped and hurried over. "Tamora! Tamora! Are you alright?"

Calhoun groaned and sat up. When she realized Felix was kneeling beside her, she said, "I thought I asked you to wait in the office."

"I'm sorry," Felix replied. "I was just looking at the equipment here. Are you alright? Do you need help out there?"

"I'm fine," Calhoun said brusquely. "Stay here." She dashed out the door. Felix, worried, crept after her. Calhoun's communicator squawked. "Alert! Alert! Cy-Bug breach of lab! Beacon down!" Calhoun stopped, shocked by the news. Felix asked, "What's wrong?"

Calhoun turned, "Please Felix! Wait in the office! This game is in serious trouble!"

Felix asked, "Why? I want to help!"

"The lab's been breached and the beacon's been damaged. Now I've got to drive the Cy-Bugs away and repair the beacon before I can activate it. It's too dangerous. Now, go!"

Felix walked back, thinking hard. "I can't just wait here while she's in danger! What can I do?" He walked into the armoury and nearly tripped. A plasma blaster was lying at his feet. Felix stared at the gun. A thoughtful look on his face, he picked it up and weighed it in his hands...

* * *

Calhoun was working her way through the Cy-Bugs with Kohut when she noticed someone charging toward the lab entrance. To her horror, it was Felix! Horrified, Calhoun yelled at Kohut, "Hold this line! Don't let them get past!" She ran full pelt towards the lab. From a distance, she saw Felix holding a blaster and charging towards the lab entrance.

"_What_ are you doing?" she cried. "Get away!" Ignoring her, Felix kept charging.

_Got to help,_ his mind raced. _Got to-ah!_

A pair of Cy-Bugs were crawling around directly in his path. When they saw him coming, they snarled and flew towards him, teeth bared.

Felix stopped, braced himself, and raised the blaster to eye level. He started shooting wildly, the shots going wild. One almost hit Calhoun, who gritted her teeth and flattened herself against the lab wall to avoid it.

"Sorry!" he cried. "I'm trying to-"

One of the cybugs sprang toward Felix and he had to stop talking in order to concentrate on the fight. He fired blindly. One of the shots struck home, blasting the cybug apart. He fired again, destroying the other. Astonished at himself, Felix stared at the gun in his hand.

_Did I just…_

He spotted a cybug flying towards the lab entrance.

_No time to dawdle!_

He aimed his gun, blasting the cybug into bits.

* * *

Calhoun was running toward Felix with her blaster raised, although she couldn't do any damage with it from range. She watched in surprise as Felix took down three Cy-Bugs in a row. She was starting to calm down when she was swarmed. She immediately began shooting her way through the seemingly never-ending cloud of Cy-Bugs, moving towards her husband.

* * *

Felix burst into the lab and scanned the room. His eyes opened wide as he was confronted with the largest Cy-Bugs he had ever seen. They were munching on anything and everything in the lab. His mind barely registered a screen and control panel labeled 'Beacon' on the other side of the room. It had been smashed, but all the pieces were scattered nearby. Felix screamed and started firing.

* * *

Calhoun shot down the last of the attacking Cy-Bugs and sprinted to the lab as fast as she could. She burst in just in time to see Felix blasting away at and stunning a gigantic Cy-Bug almost twice the normal size of its kin. He jumped away towards the beacon monitor and started fixing it with one hand and shooting with the other. He had almost finished repairing the beacon when the Cy-Bug regained concentration and lunged for him. Its size was mesmerizing. The gun dropped from his shaking hands; his eyes went wide in terror. Calhoun shot the Cy-Bug down and it crash-landed, skidding to a stop right before Felix. He opened his eyes, surprised that he was still alive. He shrugged and tapped the monitor with his magic hammer, finishing the repairs. He sighed in satisfaction, turned around…. and nearly fainted in surprise to see Calhoun frowning at him.

"Ye…yes ma'am?" Felix stuttered nervously. Calhoun continued frowning at him as she walked over to the monitor and hit several keys.

"Voice code required", the computer intoned. Calhoun replied, "Sergeant Tamora Jean Calhoun."

The computer announced, "Password correct. Activate beacon?"

Calhoun replied, "Yes." She turned to Felix as the beacon went up and asked, "Do you have an explanation for this?"

"Yes, you see, I, uh, found this, er, blaster and, uh, I-"

Calhoun cut him off with a raised hand.

"Don't you _ever_ do that again," she said. "You got lucky somehow, but you and I both know guns aren't your style. I'm amazed you didn't blow your own head off."

"That's all true," said Felix, sounding somewhat miffed. "But oughtn't I to get a little than-"

He stopped abruptly as Calhoun drew him into an embrace.

"I should have remembered the hammer," she said, smiling. "Maybe you should teach me how to use it some time."

"It'd be my pleasure, dear," said Felix, returning the smile.

* * *

As Felix and Calhoun lay in bed, tired out, Felix suddenly remembered something.

"Honey?"

"Yeah?" Calhoun replied sleepily. "What is it?"

"Remember you said that you had something special planned? What _did_ you want to do tonight?"

Calhoun chuckled. "I was going to take you to play laser tag. I thought we'd need more time to get you used to it, so I planned dinner afterward."

"But I thought you said that guns weren't…" Felix's voice trailed off.

"It's not _quite _the same thing," Calhoun assured him.

"Okay," said Felix. "I'll take your word for it. So...how 'bout trying that next week?"

Calhoun chuckled and nodded.


End file.
